Part 2 of the TV Chronicles or How I Totally Wasted my Summer Vacation

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I like Judge Judy.

Deep cleansing breath.

Don’t hate me because I’m a fan.

I admire her because she’s so confident and self-assured. I suppose it’s her judgey-ness that allows her to, well, judge people so efficiently. She never second guesses herself, either. I can’t even pick seats at the movie because I fear I’ll make a bad choice and I spend weeks replaying every comment I make at staff meetings, wishing I’d said something different or better yet, stayed quiet.

Judge Judy isn’t plagued with indecisiveness. With an authoritative tap of her pen (I guess TV judges aren’t allowed to use gavels) and a nod to Burde, she renders her decisions with lightning speed.

This is a biggie: she’s consistently pro-children. When dealing with the train wrecks that sign up for her show, she always puts the children first, often offering unsolicited advice to deadbeat parents. She says things I wish I could when I see kids in less than ideal conditions.

And then there’s her little lace collar… My sailor has suggested there’s something faintly unwholesome about my feelings for that lace collar. He’s wrong. My mom made me a dress with a similar collar when I was in elementary school. It worked when I was ten, but I’d look ridiculous if I tried to wear a black robe with a girlish lace collar now. Judy can carry it off.

Unsung fashion maverick or brilliant legal mind? This woman is both!

For these reasons, I rule in favour of Judge Judy.

I rest my case.

‘Fess up. What’s your guilty TV pleasure?